This Week

This week, we have Vacation Bible School at my church, and my Mom and I helped out.  It's amazing how quick some kids can pick up knowledge!  Most of them were eager to learn about God, and did a good job!

Things You Never Hear In Church

Things You Never Hear in Church

- Hey! It's my turn to sit in the front pew.

- I was so enthralled, I never noticed your sermon went 25 minutes over time.

- Personally I find witnessing much more enjoyable than golf.

- I've decided to give our church the $500 a month I used to send to TV evangelists.

- I volunteer to be the permanent teacher for the Junior High Sunday School class.

- Forget the denominational minimum salary, let's pay our pastor so he can live like we do.

- I love it when we sing hymns I've never heard before!

- Since we're all here, let's start the service early.

- Pastor, we'd like to send you to this Bible seminar in the Bahamas.

- Nothing inspires me and strengthens my commitment like our annual stewardship campaign!

Christian One Liners

Christian One Liners Don't let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started out as a basket case. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisors. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* When you get to your wit's end, you'll find God lives there. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* People are funny; they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your front door forever. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* God Himself does not propose to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you? *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Some minds are like concrete thoroughly mixed up and permanently set. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Peace starts with a smile. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* I don't know why some people change churches; what difference does it make which one you stay home from? *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* A lot of church members who are singing "Standing on the Promises" are just sitting on the premises. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Be ye fishers of men. You catch them - He'll clean them. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Don't put a question mark where God put a period. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Forbidden fruits create many jams. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* God grades on the cross, not the curve. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* God loves everyone, but probably prefers "fruits of the spirit" over "religious nuts!" *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* He who angers you, controls you! *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* If God is your Co-pilot - swap seats! *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Prayer: Don't give God instructions -- just report for duty! *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* The Will of God never takes you to where the Grace of God will not protect you. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* We don't change the message, the message changes us. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* You can tell how big a person is by what it takes to discourage him. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

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Bible Reading Plan for June

6-1: 2 Corinthians 10-11
 6-2              "        12-13
6-3: Galatians    1-2
6-4:   "               3-4
6-5    "               5-6

6-6: Ephesians 1-2
6-7:    "             3-4
6-8:    "             5-6
6-9:  Phillipians 1-2
6-10:  "             3-4
6-11: Colossians 1-2
6-12:    "               3-4
6-13: 1 Thess. 1-2
6-14:   "            3-4
6-15:   "            5  2 Thess. 1
6-16:                        "         2-3
6-17:   1 Timothy 1-2
6-18        "            3-4
6-19:       "            5-6
6-20:   2 Timothy 1-2
6-21:        "           3-4
6-22:    Titus 1-2
6-23:       "     3  Philemon
6-24: Hebrews 1-2
6-25:  "              3-4
6-26:  "              5-6
6-27:  "              7-8
6-28:  "              9-10
6-29:  "               11-12
6-30:  "                13, James 1
     

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